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Seeking Siblings After Secondary Infertility

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Ever since you can remember, you’ve dreamt of a future with multiple children.  

Your journey toward this dream began when you gave birth to your first child – but now, your dream has been halted by years of trying or worse, an infertility prognosis.

Something so natural before is now difficult and demoralizing.

But, there’s hope.

With infertility treatments available, egg donation may be the answer you’ve been looking for (you can find out more at:

Let’s learn more about this process, so you know what to expect as you embark on the next stage of your infertility program.

What Causes Secondary Infertility?

Infertility has a number of contributing factors, resulting in over three million American women suffering from it.

The same issues affecting secondary infertility cases are often identical to those in primary infertility stories, including defective ovulation, blocked fallopian tubes, uterine or pelvic scarring, endometriosis, being overweight or underweight, excessive drinking, smoking, and poor sperm quantity or quality.

These conditions may have worsened or developed after the birth of your first child. Your problem may have also been triggered during labor from pelvic scarring or other complications.

Or, if a few years have passed since your first pregnancy, your age may be the cause of the issues you’re experiencing.

How does age affect your fertility?

When you’re 20-24 years old, there’s a 3% chance of suffering from infertility and an 86%+ chance of getting pregnant. Fast forward to when you’re 35-39 years old, and there’s a 15% chance of suffering from infertility with a 52% chance of getting pregnant. By the time a woman is in her 40s, the odds of conceiving drop significantly.

How Does the Egg Donor Process Work?

Making the decision to use an egg donor is a huge hurdle in itself, but finding the right donor may feel like the next big challenge.

How do you choose the person who’s going to help you bring your next child into the world? And should you consider a friend or family member instead of an anonymous donor?

Thankfully, couples looking for egg donors have many options. These options enable you to find a donor that boasts all of the attributes you want your child to have.

If you choose a family member as your egg donor, you’ll have peace of mind your family’s genes are being passed on to your child.

Wouldn’t most people choose this option?

Not necessarily.


Choosing a close friend or loved one to be a donor often poses a number of issues further down the line. Do you tell your child who their donor is? How do you cope if your donor struggles with your child carrying their genes?

Why Do People Often Choose Anonymous Egg Donors?

In contrast, donors from an egg bank remain anonymous, giving you comfort that there won’t be any awkward dynamics in the future, regardless of whether you choose to tell your child about their donor or not.

They won’t share your genes though, will they?

While your child won’t carry the same genetics as you, if you want you can make sure they possess the same type of attributes and traits.  

With access to an extensive pool of candidates from the clinic’s database, you can search through  donors using a vast array of search options, from eye color to academic achievements. This wide range of possibilities gives you the opportunity to find a donor that ideally matches your requirements.

What Happens When You Find a Donor?

After you’ve selected a donor, you’ll need to take fertility drugs to help prepare you for embryo implantation. Fresh donor egg also involves synchronizing your cycle with your donor’s – a process not required for frozen donor egg.

Once ready, the eggs are fertilized (having been thawed if you’re using frozen eggs) with sperm (either your partner’s or a donor’s). Then, they’re put into an incubator where they remain for 3-5 days until a specialist fertility doctor transfers 1-2 of them into your uterus.

A pregnancy test two weeks later confirms your pregnancy.

Working Toward Your Dream Family

Understandably, the entire IVF process can evoke a mass of emotions, from elation to anguish and anxiety to anger. However, all of these feelings and thoughts are completely natural, and it’s important to work through these with your partner.

Nevertheless, after the initial diagnosis of infertility, donor eggs give you the hope you’ve been so desperately searching for.

Within a few months, you’ll be nurturing your unborn baby in your tummy, and looking forward to bringing him or her into the world to meet their big brother or sister.

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